1.06.2005

the scary thing is, this sounds like a true story


George Bush is visiting the Queen of England. He asks her, "Your Majesty, how do you run such an efficient government? Are there any tips you can give me?"

"Well," says the Queen, "the most important thing is to surround yourself with intelligent people."

Bush frowns. "But how do I know the people around me are really intelligent?"

The Queen takes a sip of tea. "Oh, that's easy. You just ask them to answer an intelligence riddle. The Queen pushes a button on her intercom. "Please send The Prime Minister in here, would you?"

Tony Blair walks into the room. "Your Majesty..."

The Queen smiles. "Answer me this, please, Tony. Your mother and father have a child. It is not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is it?"

Without pausing for a moment, Blair answers, "That would be me!"

"Yes! Very good!" says the Queen.

Back at the White House, Bush calls in his vice president, Dick Cheney. "Dick, answer this for me. Your mother and your father have a child. It's not your brother and it's not your sister. Who is it?"

"I'm not sure," says the vice president. "Let me get back to you on that one." Dick Cheney goes to his advisers and asks every one, but none can give him an answer. Finally, he ends up in the men's room and recognizes Colin Powell's shoes in the next stall.

Dick shouts, "Colin! Can you answer this for me? Your mother and father have a child and it's not your brother or your sister. Who is it?"

Colin Powell yells back, "That's easy. It's me!"

Dick Cheney smiles. "Thanks!"

Cheney goes back to the Oval Office and asks to speak with Bush. "Say, I did some research and I have the answer to that riddle. It's Colin Powell."

Bush gets up, stomps over to Dick Cheney, and angrily yells into his face, "No, you idiot! It's Tony Blair!"

Why does Snoop Doggy Dog carry an umbrella everywhere he goes?


In case it drizzles

1.05.2005

Indian Coast Guard retreats under fire


This was our local front page story today and I loved it so much I just had to post it. It's interesting that the tribesman is using a longbow. It would be interesting to learn the history of the longbow with these people, if they have any form of recorded history.

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In this photo released by the Indian Coast Guard, a Sentinel tribal man aims with his bow and arrow at an Indian Coast Guard helicopter as it flies over their island for survey in Indias Andaman and Nicobar archipelago, Tuesday, Dec, 28, 2004.

Bow-and-arrow tribes live on, tsunami or not

PORT BLAIR, India -- Two days after a tsunami thrashed the island where his ancestors have lived for tens of thousands of years, a lone tribesman stood naked on the beach and looked up at a hovering coast guard helicopter.

He then took out his bow and shot an arrow toward the rescue chopper.

It was a signal the Sentinelese have sent out to the world for millennia: They want to be left alone. . .
(continued at the link)

our hero


It was announced at a press conference today that presidant bush gave $10,000 of his own money as aid for the tsunami victims. Take that Sandra Bullock! You and your million dollar aid donation giving liberal ass has been one upped by the pocket change of an east coast elitist from a family full of triple millionairres.

At any rate, when asked who he gave the money to, his spokesman Scott McClellan said he gave to some of the charities on the list at usafreedomcorps.gov. Looking at the list I can guess which ones they are, they're the ones with Christian or Methodist in their name. No doubt the money was probably given with the stipulation that it would not be used in any gay liberal/socialist ways such as providing food and water, but should instead only be used to buy $10,000 worth of Bibles and abstinance education for the brown people.

On a totally unrelated note, bush also got a $10,000 donation for his inagural celebration a few days ago from a top democrat, not that these two totally different stories about bush and 10k dollars would be related in any way.

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